10% of Your LJ Experience

As far as I can tell, I am still asleep. This is particularly scary since it is my week to drive. Also, I am developing a weird issue where I keep saying the wrong thing.

I'm not talking about rudeness or inappropriateness or even awkward moments of conversation. Example:

Tuesday was my first day back at work after the holiday, naturally. And so there were people I hadn't seen and I'm catching up with how they spent the weekend and I ask Coworker R: "So, how was your Fourth of July?"

...

I SWEAR I MEANT NEW YEAR'S! And yet that is not what I said and she just LOOKED at me and was like, ummmm...

But once is just distraction. Yesterday BFF and I were driving home from work and she said something which made me tell her I was ignoring her and she thwaped me on the shoulder.

And I said "Don't hit the dragon."

I meant DRIVER. *bursts into tears* And the worst thing is you can NOT say "don't hit the dragon" when somebody hits you without receiving years of mocking in the future.

So now I'm afraid to talk at all, because who knows what's going to come out of my mouth? Also, just so you know, I do NOT self-identify as a dragon. And now I feel incredibly pretentious. ALthough, when not about swmbo, don't hit the dragon is really good advice and I hope you all take it.


I think that's really all I have to say. Oh! We have to make COLLAGES at LuthorCorp. One for each department, reflecting the diversity and spirit of the employees of that department. And then they're going to be put in shadowboxes and hung in our rec room. Because apparently we haven't played with construction paper and paste recently enough.

I hope you all have lovely days and if you see a cup of coffee, can you bring it over here? I am SO TIRED I COULD DIE.